In the course of your relationships, you’ve likely experienced things that have felt uncomfortable, challenging, or difficult. You’ve probably brought some of these things up at various points, probably with varying degrees of success. If so, I have some good news for you: you can improve your ability to clear…

Practical steps for repair and reconciliation — Most of us can sense a breakdown in a relationship. This typically happens when we’ve broken an agreement or when we’ve compromised a value we hold. Sometimes when we intuit repair is necessary, we attempt to make things right. This happens when we apologize or seek forgiveness. …

A Foundation of our Social World — A simple, yet surprisingly profound experience two or more people can share in relationship with each other is shared reality. Weaving shared reality is the process of communicating so we are getting on the same page with another person, creating mutual understanding. There is your reality, what you experience as…

This year, 2019, I’ve had the privilege of launching a new enterprise with my co-founders, Jess Nichol and Josh Zemel. We met years ago as fellow faculty at the Integral Center, a training and development organization. …

Two Complementary Approaches to the New World of Work — During my years as an engineer with Hewlett-Packard, I had the privilege of working with many talented and hard-working individuals. On good days, I put forth my best in the service of large project teams with enthusiasm. …

If you want to build something big, first, go deep. In every big city, each high-rise building attaches to the bedrock of the earth, far below the ground surface. Years ago, during the dot-com boom of the late ’90s, I commuted each workday to San Francisco’s SoMa district on the…

Welcome to the Relational Dimension of Leadership — Good leaders bring whatever is required to move a situation forward, whether it’s inspiring others with a vision, challenging the status quo, or taking a bold risk. The best leaders also bring awareness and care to the quality of their relationships. …

The Foundation of Relational Intelligence — What comes to mind when you think of mindfulness? Meditation? Conscientiousness? Relaxation? Focus? Calm? Chances are, whatever you’re thinking of carries a sense of individual introspection. Before I learned to practice relational mindfulness, people and relationships would disturb any state of calm, relaxed focus I would sometimes achieve from meditation.

Communicate Responsibly for Connection and Potency — Do you find yourself wishing that people would understand and respect your opinions more than they seem to? Do you compare yourself negatively to others who seem to have an uncanny ability to influence others? Are you dissatisfied with your ability to take conversations deeper, to a place where people…